Listen in on the radio transmissions between ranch dog Pancho, callsign BadDog, and the foreman of the outfit, callsign RanchBoss, as Pancho does a combat pug patrol on the back pasture. Here’s the key to radio language you need to know to follow along: Tallyho = I see it; Fox 1 = means weapon fired, in this case pug stinkeye laser glare; Fox 2 = means weapon fired, devasting pug yapping sonic blaster; Winchester = out of ammo; Mike = meter (just over a yard); Buster = afterburners lit; Romeo Tango Bravo = RTB = Return to Base; Feet Wet = flying over water.
BadDog: RanchBoss, BadDog with you straight and level south pasture.
RanchBoss: Roger, BadDog, be advised bovine bogey at bearing 050 and 30 Mike. Do not engage.
BadDog: Tallyho! She’s a big ‘un. I am turning into her.
RanchBoss: BadDog, DO NOT ENGAGE. BadDog, how do you read?
BadDog: BadDog going Buster, 10 Mike and closing, weapons armed.
RanchBoss: Break Left, Break Left. DO NOT ENGAGE. KNOCK IT OFF. ROMEO TANGO BRAVO. BadDog, do you copy?
BadDog: Fox1, RanchBoss. Complete furrball. Fox1. Gasp. Fox2. Fox2.
RanchBoss: BadDog, get outta there. I can’t cover you.
BadDog: Fox1, Fox2, garbled, Fox1, Fox2. Helpppppp. Where are Maverick and Goose when I need ’em?
RanchBoss: Break right. Break right.
BadDog (screaming): BadDog is Winchester. Boy is she mad. I’m pulling 8 g for a 180 degree turn. I’ll bring her right across your nose for a clean shot.
RanchBoss: Do not bring that angry cow to RanchBoss. Break left. Repeat: do not bring angry cow to RanchBoss.
BadDog (still screaming): Boy is she hot. She’s all yours. Better call search and rescue. BadDog needs a Medevac. BadDog going Feet Wet at South stock tank. BadDog out!
Your Pal, Pancho.
#PanchoRanchPug